A LETTER TO GOD -2 continued

A LETTER TO GOD – contd.

Dear God,

Sometime ago I wrote to you and in the process purged myself of all the those thoughts that had risen within me regarding the fallibility of all the beliefs that we have subjected ourselves to in the course of leading our lives. I even went to the extent of questioning whether you existed and if so why you have been a silent spectator to the events that were occurring and which seemed independent of your existence. I even said that your miracles happened only if they were destined to happen and that you yourself were bound by destiny. I had raised serious doubts as to Karma and how it is supposed to rule our present living. For me I am unable to accept the fact that our actions in our past life are affecting us now and the fruit of our actions in the present life will be realised in the next life. For me I do not know my past nor can I envisage the future, so the only reality I experience its the present life. My concern has been regarding the ethical disparities that exist. We are held responsible for a life that we do not remember to have lived. Unless we reap the benefits of our actions in this life itself, there is no meaning to the life we live now. The present life, where I can still remember the past and correct my actions where I have gone wrong before, and to avoid repeating the same mistakes which had brought me pain and sorrow. The only thing you have given me is hope and that is why I had said that you were my friend, philosopher, guide and God. That is the present situation and it continues.

I know you received my last letter as I had received an acknowledgement saying that I have your blessings. You have given me hope again and only hope. I did not expect anything else. So I do not have anything to complain about.

But God, I shall continue to trouble you as I need answers to the various questions that keep cropping up in my mind from time to time. After all to whom else can I turn to, to be my friend, to be by my side and to lead me on towards understanding the life I am living now. Even though everyone sees the world from his point of view that is the world as he sees it, and in such a case there should be as many views of this world as there are living beings, you have made laws, universal laws that are not affected by any of these views. These are truths on which each of these subjective views have been built on. The world exists, oblivious of the way it is looked at. It exists till eternity I guess, because it will still be there when I am gone. You may ask as to how is it that I have arrived at the conclusion that the world will continue till eternity, when for the individual it would have ended and he will not even be aware of it. I can only say that it is a subjective comprehension, for I see things carry on even after the individual has vanished  bodily from this world. That brings me back to the basic question as to what is the purpose of living if ultimately there will be only nothingness. Why do you make us experience the pains and pleasures, joys and sorrows in the course of living? I know you will say that it is the body and the mind that experiences and that there is a soul beyond all this that does not vanish. That it is deathless and is part of an undivided whole. You will ask me whether I have read your Gita and that I shall find answers to my questions. I have tried and shall try again. It did give me hope, like you have done so far, but still a lot of it is beyond my comprehension. 

The Vedas affirm that God is neither accessible to words nor to mind.  It is said that you cannot be comprehended with the human mind alone, even if one spends all his life trying!  Given this infinite nature of yours and who is not governed or constrained by any of the physical laws as we know them, how am I to realise and understand you as I have only a human mind.

I have taken the following stanzas from the Gita and have been meditating upon them:

 It (the self) is not born, and It does not die; nor is it ever that this One having been nonexistent becomes existent again. This One is birthless, eternal, undecaying, ancient; It is not killed when the body is killed.
-Gita Ch.2 Verse 20
Of the unreal there is no being; the real has no nonexistence.
The nature of both of them, indeed, has been realised by the seers of Truth.
-Gita Ch.2, Shloka 16
As after rejecting (discarding) worn out clothes a man takes up other new ones (clothes), likewise after rejecting worn out bodies the embodied one (soul) duly attains new ones.
-Gita Ch.2 Verse 22

Since death of anyone born is certain, and of the dead (re-)birth is a certainty, therefore you ought not to grieve over an inevitable fact.
-Gita Ch. 2 Verse 27

It is very comforting I agree, I can understand that death is a certainty because I see it, but of rebirth, even though you have told me time and again that reincarnation takes place I have not seen it happening, only been told of it.

What is it that I look forward to from you? Just listen to me and take me through this process of self enquiry because asking you to perform a miracle so that I start believing in you I guess is not in the scheme of things, as I have come to believe that things will happen as destined and you will not interfere.

I shall be writing to you time and again whether you acknowledge or not. I am sure you will be listening to me. Maybe smiling?

Yours truly, I shall always remain,